Monday, November 2, 2009

outside

I've started realizing something recently...

Every time I'm at school, I get to observe society...
The laughs and jokes people share. The physical and psychic forces pulling them together. Simple, wonderful, and yet...

I've come to realize that I can never truly be a part of it.

All of this I observe as if from behind a thin glass window...
Unable to reach, unable to place myself in this phase of reality. There is no doorway, nowhere to fit in.
I can communicate, I can sometimes find a way across the glass.
I can sometimes peer out from above that wall and find someone else, peering out as well, waving to me.

But I can never stay inside.
A part of me feels far too removed, leaning its metaphorical hand on the glass.

This feeling is much weaker among the Kuro, but still comes around sometimes to haunt me. Even there, I sometimes feel pushed back behind that glass...

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