forward

Yeah, this was written at a late hour. The sky here is slowly gaining a bluish tint, marking the slow arrival of the day - which, in my head, is still "tomorrow", despite being the same segment of 24 hours I'll wake up in. And I have to wake up in about four hours from writing this... to meet the Blacks and head out on another long and hopefully enjoyable get-together.

I was staring at my blog, at the blogroll I just experimentally added... (Sadly, the blogs are particularly specific - two of them are strongly related to my favourite game, World of Warcraft and one is in Polish.)

Then, something occured to me.

Several years ago, under this very address, I had a blog.

It was one of those brief ventures into blogging that I quickly abandoned...

I have changed vastly since then. I saw it in how I constructed my blog this time around...

I also see it when I look back at my past.

There are so many things that make me cringe with disgust and horror at how stupid, immature and blind I was. It may have been years ago or actually not so long ago... but in general, I was always worse than I am.

I think it's a good sign.

It means that I'm moving forward. If I weren't, I would either not notice any gradual changes, or in fact find the past something too good, something I wish to return to.

Of course, there are also regrets of the past. During winter, I had a really good opportunity in front of me to get closer to a girl I was genuinely interested in... and I let it run past. There was never a better moment.

I should never stop, I should never try and turn myself back to how I was. This is building myself on experience. Experience and using it properly are what makes us develop ourselves and go forward.

Never close your eyes, never turn your back, never stop thinking.

Forward.